What most of us are unaware of is that in the majority of cases, we are more scared of being scared than of the object of our fear itself. What I mean is that we try to do anything to avoid fear because of the unpleasantness of the feeling. Because we have experienced this feeling in the past, we also expect to experience it in the future. And for that matter, we do apprehend its manifestation as much as its object. We are scared of Fear. Just imagining ourselves in a situation that would scare us will engender a feeling of fear in the now. And most of the time, when the ‘scary’ situation presents itself, it is not as scary as what we first thought. We make ourselves scared right up until the actual event that is preoccupying us, sometimes to the point of feeling sick. That`s what stress is. We go through all kinds of scenarios in our head, each one scarier than the last. But when our big scary event occurs, it just happens, very simply. And then it`s over. It`s done. We all make it in the end. We are all happy that it`s done, and think that after all it was not that bad. We then realize how unnecessary all that fear was.(…). Another example, you may have heard people say, or you may have said it yourself:’ if this happened I would die’, or ‘if that happened I couldn`t cope with it’. My mum told me once:’ if I see a big snake crossing in front of me I will have a heart attack’. Of course you won`t, Mum. You are very scared of snakes for whatever reason, and as such you think that this fear would kill you if it presents itself. I tell you what, if a snake crosses your path, you will find yourself stopping, body and mind. Your heart will race, not stop. And then a few seconds later it`s all over. The snake is gone and you keep on walking, still alive. You may actually become more scared after than during the encounter, as you will rewind in your mind that scene you just lived, and experience fear over and over again. In the moment as such, there was nothing, just pure awareness of a situation and straight action in accordance with it. But when you are telling me that: ’I will be so scared if I see a snake’ you are actually experiencing fear right now about a projection of being scared in the future. All experiences are happening in the now. You can never know how you will react in the future. The fear of fear is useless and scary.

Excerpt from 7 Illusions

16 Comments Add yours

  1. Yes, ‘Stress is a preoccupation with emotional upset’ (D Roger). We spend time regretting the past or being anxious about the future, when the only reality is Now.


  2. Marty says:

    I have written articles on this. having severe Complex PTSD, exploding triggers brought fear out like no other event in my life. Avoidance is one of the symptoms, we do anything not to experience the adrenal stress response, our fight or flight mechanism firing.

    Through the practice of mindfulness, I learned to stay present when fear exploded, I found only a mechanism, fear did not contain any fear inside itself, it was always the storyline I added that was scary.

    Nothing real hides behind our triggers. Most of my fears in life disappeared, my fear of fear stopped.

    Is it not our reaction to situations and people that cause suffering?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. karenwilson says:

      That`s true Marty, our reactions cause our own suffering. And they come mostly from our perception of reality, through our own mind ‘filters’, beliefs, about ourselves or about life. In the NOW there is no fear, there is ‘nothing’.
      I like that:” Nothing real hides behind our triggers”
      Thank you for your post.


  3. Marty says:

    After responding to your post, I wrote this post, Now!!! Now!!!


    Well when we drop judgment, like coming to a speed bump, we slow down, so we do not launch our cars, that brings us to now. A reset.

    Nice post Karen.


    Liked by 1 person

  4. John A. Olore says:

    Thanks for sharing this, Karen. Fear has been a big part of my life, and I’m just beginning to learn to deal with it in an appropriate manner.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. karenwilson says:

      Staying in the present instead of following imaginative fears scenarios is a good way to deal with that.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. John A. Olore says:

        I agree. “Mindfulness” has been my rallying cry for the past year.


      2. karenwilson says:

        Yes, learning meditation was the best thing i`ve done in my life 🙂


  5. John A. Olore says:

    Reblogged this on Olore After Dark and commented:
    Fear has been one of the greatest, most influential forces over the course of my lifetime, and I’m only now learning to recognize it, to understand it and to manage it.


  6. In the Stillness of Willow Hill says:

    I always ask myself…….what would I feel like right now without the story? Works every time.


  7. YesRising says:

    Awesome post!!! 🙂


  8. Life creates fear itself. To fear fear is to plan for survival and I hope you survive for a long time because you have a beautiful mind.

    To fear fear is to avoid potentially harmful situations. Fear is needed for survival. However courage is needed too in order to survive. We must have the courage to stop the rape of our mother earth or we will not survive! Fear and courage must exist in balance.

    When observing the size of our beautiful Universe itself, fear seems to be without logic. Then real courage sets in. When there is courage there can be pure love. When there is pure love we can find the truth. Truth will lead us and future generations to prosperity.


    1. karenwilson says:

      That`s beautiful 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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